Advice From The Comic Hack 153 – The “It’s Been A Tough Week And Questions About Truth And Freedom” Edition

Aug 28

Advice From The Comic Hack 153 – The “It’s Been A Tough Week And Questions About Truth And Freedom” Edition

Veritas vos Liberabit my lovely readers. I wrote that sentence not only to watch the spellcheck function in Microsoft Office choke and die; but to remind you that often, the solution for some of life’s thorniest problems are the simplest and that the answers can be found  in sources you may have forgotten about.   I hope that you, the often flattered and always adored Darling Readers  remember that the best place to look for advice and wisdom is right here in this column every week. But with the recent spate of occurrences of “life” interfering with my… Ummm… Life. I found that I didn’t have the time or resources to tackle a brand new Advice Column today. Instead I have brought back a piece I wrote ages ago back before this blog came to be. Today we shall address the concerns of a Darling Reader pressed by a boyfriend who doesn’t do his duty, a Darling Reader with a desire to take their significant other to the dark side and the classic tale of a woman with one love too many. Read on friends and I will point out to each of you that Veritas vos Liberabit, is Latin for “The truth shall set you free”. While you marvel at the fact that I – the avowed atheist have just once-again made a biblical reference (John 8:32), you might also want to go ahead and use my NEW ADDRESS: advicequestions@comichacksguide.com To submit some questions of your own. I really need some inspiring ones Darling Readers – Help me out! Hallelujah! (Editor’s note: part of this week’s column originally appeared on the page where this column got its start – the Renaissance Festivals Facebook Page. All 99 of those original columns have been removed and a choice selection of them will be appearing in the upcoming book “The Comic Hack’s Guide to Life” – Please enjoy today’s Déjà vu edition as our columnist recovers from an especially hectic and trying two weeks) How do you tell your boyfriend that just once you would like him to take you on a honest to goodness date and act a little more like a boyfriend and less like a friend with benefits? This is going to require a little planning and forethought because most states...

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The Comic Hacks Guide To Entertainment – Fantastic Four (The Movie Review) – Long Version

Aug 17

The Comic Hacks Guide To Entertainment – Fantastic Four (The Movie Review) – Long Version

This is the LONG, Un-Cut Version of this article. The tighter, punchier version is HERE   Today is a sad day. Today I review the Fox Studio 2015 reboot of Fantastic Four. Do Not See This Movie. I can cut to the chase and actually end the review right there. Do not see this movie. Not even in a “slow down to look at the car crash” way. Don’t see it ironically. Don’t see it because it’s so bad that it’s good. Simply do not see it. No! Bad movie audience, no cookie! Now full disclosure. I LIKED the first two adaptations Sony put out. I thought the cast was great – with an oddly blond, oddly bland Jessica Alba being the only weak point. I liked the action, the story and the characterization and especially the banter.  I’m not really a big fan of Fantastic Four – I have always felt that they were one of Marvel’s weakest properties. I think of them as  kind of silly and immature. But like anyone who grew up at the same time as I did; I know enough about Ben, Reed, Sue and Johnny to tell when it’s been screwed up. Continuing full disclosure, as I pointed out in my very first review I don’t trust or always agree with entertainment critics. It seems like most critics have some weird axe to grind and many of them just don’t like movies. I LOVE the movies, Love ’em. I like comic book heroes and spies and yes, video games bad-guys attacking earth. I have no problem with a movie being merely BIG DUMB FUN as long as it has no pretensions about  it. I like escapist fantasy.  I like stunning visuals, great stories and edge of your seat excitement. Sometimes I’ll settle for as little as giant robots and giant creatures hitting each other. I get giddy over thrilling fights and big explosions. But this movie had almost NONE of that. It lacked any charm, any thrills or any coherent story. Hey Fox Studios – It doesn’t take that much to have me enjoy your movie… so how and why did you screw it up so badly? In preparation for seeing this film, I did what I always do and...

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The Comic Hacks Guide To Entertainment – Fantastic Four (The Movie Review)

Aug 17

The Comic Hacks Guide To Entertainment – Fantastic Four (The Movie Review)

Today is a sad day. Today I review the Fox Studio 2015 reboot of Fantastic Four. Do Not See This Movie. I can cut to the chase and actually end the review right there. Do not see this movie. Not even in a “slow down to look at the car crash” way. Don’t see it ironically. Don’t see it because it’s so bad that it’s good. Simply do not see it. No! Bad movie audience, no cookie! Now full disclosure. I LIKED the first two adaptations Sony put out. I thought the cast was great – with an oddly blond, oddly bland Jessica Alba being the only weak point. I liked the action, the story, the characterization and especially the banter.  I’m not really a big fan of Fantastic Four – I have always felt that they were one of Marvel’s weakest properties. I think of them as  kind of silly and immature. But like anyone who grew up at the same time as I did; I know enough about Ben, Reed, Sue and Johnny to tell when it’s been screwed up. I LOVE the movies, Love ’em. I like comic book heroes and spies and yes, video game bad-guys attacking earth. I have no problem with a movie being merely BIG DUMB FUN as long as it has no pretensions about  it. I like escapist fantasy.  I like stunning visuals, great stories and edge of your seat excitement. Sometimes I’ll settle for as little as giant robots and giant creatures hitting each other. I get giddy over thrilling fights and big explosions. But this movie had almost NONE of that. It lacked any charm, any thrills or any coherent story.  I wanted to like this movie. I was conditioned by the media to HATE this movie.  But I kind of wanted to see the critics proven wrong again. It turns out that conditioning was totally unnecessary Fantastic Four made me hate it all on it’s own merits. I went in trying to keep a open mind and asked myself “How Bad could it be” the answer; regrettably, was “So, so, VERY BAD”! From the very early on in this cinematic train wreck I jotted down a note that said “WTF? – I understand the marketing...

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Advice From The Comic Hack 152 – The Death, Grief And Writer’s Block Edition

Aug 14

Advice From The Comic Hack 152 – The Death, Grief And Writer’s Block Edition

My Advice Column doesn’t start off with a clever quote and a poppy description of a cultural icon this week. My Advice Column is going to be a little short on jokes and even more short on brand new material this time. There’s been a death, close to me… I am grieving. But at least I get to bring back the proverbial Steam Shovel.   Last weekend was a rough one for Your Humble Comic Hack. I found out late Saturday night about the death of a friend. He held an odd and treasured spot in my life. I only tended to see him three or four months out of the year, but I liked him, and the running joke that he was my “Secret Boy-Crush” kept us in touch throughout the year on Facebook. It was a joke involving many of our friends, his girlfriend, even his dad. Fun. I’m not going to identify him here. That’s not really the point. I’m not going to discuss him outside this paragraph; it’s not my place and those he left behind have so much to deal with. He was my friend.  He was a man full of promise. He was a light with an infectious smile and a happy-go-lucky attitude. He was funny and sweet. He was a great kid. He was family. I wish we were closer, I wish we’d had more time together. I wish he had more time. He was only 25. He was young and immortal until he was not. Now he’s gone.   I knew I’d taken a hit but didn’t realize how hard until I sat down to write a column about a Darling Reader who needs advice on how to deal with a friend still obsessed with a horrible ex-boyfriend. No words would come. It wasn’t until tonight – Fifteen hours after the column was supposed to be published – let alone written – that I could even figure out what to do. My friend deserves more than this. But this is the best I can manage. Please read these two responses to Darling Readers who had questions of their own about GRIEF and MOURNING.  You’ll also be my hero if you send in questions for future...

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The Comic Hacks Guide to Entertainment – Gummo (The movie review)

Aug 10

The Comic Hacks Guide to Entertainment – Gummo (The movie review)

Hey guys! I’ve added a new, weekly feature to The Comic Hack’s Guide. Every Monday I’ll publish a review of whatever interesting entertainment caught my eye the previous week. There will be movie reviews – both those currently in the theater and those on Blu ray – TV reviews, plays… whatever strikes my fancy most. If it appeals to you and keeps being fun for me – I’ll keep it going. The Comic Hacks Guide to Entertainment  This week’s diversion: Gummo (note NSFW language) ________________________________________________________________ What the fuck did I just watch. No seriously, WHAT. THE. FUCK. DID. I. JUST. WATCH  – and why? A little background before I relate my traumatizing experience with 1997’s GUMMO. I have an old-school Netflix account. It wasn’t until the release of Daredevil that I discovered the agony and ecstasy of that company’s streaming service. It might be because I have sporadic access to broadband or it might be becaue I’m a technological dinosaur. Though the streaming part is a fresh new experience for me I have been using – some might suggest misusing – the mailed disk option for years. I currently have over 180 movies in my DVD queue . Most are bizarre or obscure.  Often they are recommendations from websites suggesting I might have missed this, that or the other disturbing gem of a film. To be fair,  I have received  treasures in the mail in those bright red envelopes. I’m making my way through the DC Animated Universe for example and I’ve seen cult films like Hobo with a Shotgun and for some reason a slew of horror flicks of a very “rapey” nature. I have also gotten pure drek that I couldn’t even force myself to watch. Some films you expect to be bad – I’m waiting for Dead Hooker in the Trunk to work it’s way into my mail box and some… some are fucking GUMMO. I wish you could have watched my face as I watched this nightmare. But I would prefer to spare you being in the same room as this Harmony Korine monstrosity. Listen, I actually enjoyed Spring Breakers somewhat. I don’t despise Korine  as a director out of hand. It’s not even the bleak vision of the movie… I guess . I found...

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